The act of bringing a child into the world is a noble one in and of itself. Many parents who find themselves in a position where they are unable to raise their own child feel that they are inferior and that they have failed the child but this is simply not true. Simply having given a child life is a great feat, and having the courage to have gone through with putting child up for adoption is a respectable accomplishment. Anyone can submit to emotions and choose to keep a child without considering the feasibility of the situation, but it takes a loving, conscientious individual to recognize that allowing another family to raise their child might be the best option for the baby.

When considering putting child up for adoption, the first thought many birth parents encounter is whether the decision makes them a failure or irresponsible. Many wonder if they should try to keep and raise the child, just for the purpose of keeping up appearances and looking strong. This is understandable, as when a woman is pregnant, she is sure to be bombarded with questions and comments about when the baby is due, what it will be named, if she has her nursery ready, and if she is excited about her pending role as a new mother. It is easy to bend to the pressure and make a decision based on other people’s assumptions and expectations. Everyone knows, however, that not everyone is in a position where they are ready to be a parent and for many, the choice of putting child up for adoption will be the best one, as tough as it will make the pregnancy and the attention that comes with it.

Making the choice of putting child up for adoption is often the best choice for the child and the adoptive family, as well as for the birth parents. The child will thrive in an environment where there is certainty, financial stability, and a family that was absolutely sure of their choice to expand. The adoptive parents will have the fulfillment of adding a child to their family, regardless of whether they were able to conceive on their own or not. The birth parents will also benefit, as they will have more time to decide if a family is what they want, and they won’t have to worry about the mental, emotional, or financial challenges that come with an unexpected child. The decision will be a hard one but will likely be best one for everyone in the end.

The decision of putting child up for adoption should be made based on what the birth parents know is right for them and the child, not on what others expect from them. Giving a child up doesn’t mean that a birth parent can never have a family of their own – many people who have given children up went on to have a family of their own later in life, when they were ready to make the commitment. Whatever you decide in regards to an unexpected pregnancy, just be sure to make the decision based on what’s best for you and the child and not on the assumptions of society.

This guest post was written by Mavis Liddick, on behalf of Adopt Help, a full service domestic adoption center specializing in both independent and collaborative adoptions. To know more about choosing a child for adoption, you may visit

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